malloryray.com

House

Last night we stayed the first time in the new house. It’s so quiet! No cars, annoying people upstairs, no ambulance sirens. After living in student housing for 3 years, this was really nice. This morning I ate breakfast while looking out at the woods. Oh! I saw quail in the grass while driving through the community. I hope there’s other wildlife out there. I’m wondering if I want to put a bird feeder in the backyard. The only problem I foresee is that there is a vent between my room and the living room and that may need to be covered up. It lets in light and sound from the living room. And it only takes me 20 mins to get to work from here. Granted, I left at 8 and if I left at 8:30 it may be a different story. Now I just have to make sure to leave before 5 and I’ll be missing rush hour traffic both ways.

Rob’s dad came down yesterday with a truck. They had the mattresses, dressers, huge TV, coffee table and end tables. Everything was super dusty, so I’ve got some cleaning to do this weekend. The dressers also smell musty, so I need to let them air out or scent them. We got the bed set up, but didn’t sleep on it last night. We slept on the air mattress. Rob and his dad are going to my place today to pick up the china cabinet and some large boxes. I’m almost moved out! I tried to get pictures of the new place, but they didn’t really convey the size of the place.

Speaking of my apartment. I have a new roommate. That I didn’t know had even moved in. Her name is Jen and she’s 18 or something. I saw her briefly yesterday when I was moving some stuff out. I think she’s blonde. I may have to deal with her this Saturday because it’s her birthday or something. I’ll be packing and doing laundry, so I shouldn’t be bothering her too much.

Box

Right now I feel like I’m in a little box. I have to be at everyone else’s convenience. I have to do things on their timetables. And for me, this is like being in a little box. I am usually in control of where I can go, what I can do and now I’m not. I have to rely on Rob to get in and out of his apartment. I am at Amber’s whim as to when I can come over to my own apartment by myself. When she is there I have to go over at Rob’s convenience, cause Rob has stuff he has to do. I don’t really want to ask the guys to go over there and just sit around while I pack boxes, that’s a waste of their time. It’s all so frustrating. But the box is slowly getting bigger. We have the keys to the house, so I can go over there. Like on Sunday when I forgot to get the keys to his apartment and couldn’t go to my apartment cause Amber could be there. 7 hours in the new house wasn’t so bad, I just could have gotten a lot more done if I could have gone into my apartment. Yesterday we put together the bed and on Thurs/Fri Rob’s mom will be bringing the mattresses. So I could technically live there; just without cable, internet and a fridge. And I’m sure there’s times where she’s not in the apartment, but I don’t know, and that’s more wasted time. I will stick to the agreement no matter what. Just none of this is convenient for me and more often than not a waste of time. Also the rain is annoying cause I can’t put boxes in the back of my truck.

Another thing contributing to this box is that there are so many things I want to write about but can’t. Even just simple things like I wish I could have some afternoons alone in my own apartment, but am afraid to ask Amber because I have no idea what her reaction would be. Or that I am still afraid of her calling the cops on me for some stupid simple slight. But I can’t really write about those things. I prolly shouldn’t have even written those two sentences. And to me, this is the most bothersome thing. If I can’t write it down, it dwells in my mind. Last weekend Dad told me the cure for anxiety was action. But what action can I take here? The Main (and practically Only) reason for this website is as a journal. Other than the portfolio, there’s no purpose. I don’t call my parents every night because I hate talking on the phone. This is where they find out what and how I’m doing. My grandfather even reads this, and much of the design is for him to be able to read it. :heart: I don’t like email because it’s not centralized. You can access my website from anywhere, and their emails are tied to their work and home.

So now, imagine that you couldn’t form words, just noises. You can’t communicate but in grunts and sounds. That’s how it’s like for me to not be able to write what I want. I have the fingers and the ability, it’s just not possible for me to express myself completely.

Oh, and I’ve started my period. The first day is always the worst.

Almost

Yesterday I almost got in a car accident. Like thiiis clooose to getting hit in the front. I was in the left lane of a three lane road. There was a median where a car was turning left and another car in front of it, waiting to get into traffic on the road I was on. Well, the idiot just started to GO as I was just passing the waiting car. At first I thought he was just sort of inching into traffic, cause he couldn’t see around the other car. But no, he had put on the gas and was suddenly about 3 feet into my lane. I had to swerve into the middle lane to avoid him. THANK GOD there was no one in that lane. I hope that idiot drives more carefully. I doubt it though. There seems to be a trend in people driving like crap, or just sloppy. The Pope put out his driving commandments. These idiot drivers should follow them.

My teeth are doing well. My tongue still feels odd. I guess there was some nerve damage when they took out the bottom tooth on my left. It’s not bad, just feels odd. Hopefully it will go back to normal in a little while.

Working on getting the new house together. Lots of crap to buy. Like a garden hose and rolling garbage bin. Comcast is going out there today to hopefully set everything up. And we have to program the sprinkler system. I have to wash some dishes out there. I may take my vacuum over there too. I have a huge list of stuff I need to take over there. I spent like all day yesterday at the new house. I unpacked some of my stuff, organized my closet, worked in the kitchen, did some sewing I needed to do. Cleaned the microwave, it had this weird dust in it. Put up a curtain in the kitchen. May be a little girly for the guys, if so I can just move it into my bathroom. Oh, and I was wrong about the bathtub having jets. It’s still huge. And we moved the bed into my room. We’ll assemble it sometime today or tomorrow so that we can put the mattresses on it when Rob’s mom brings them. :heart: Thanks for the mattresses!